SOME HMO FAQ'S
Q) I just joined a new HMO. How difficult will it be to choose the doctor I want?
A) Just slightly more difficult than choosing your parents. Your insurer will provide you with a book listing all the doctors who were participating in the plan at the time the information was gathered. These doctors basically fall into two categories--those who are no longer accepting new patients, and those who will see you but are no longer part of the plan. But don't worry--the remaining doctor who is still in the plan and accepting new patients has an office just a half a day's drive away.
Q) What does HMO stand for?
A) This is actually a variation of the phrase "Hey, Moe!" Its roots go back to a concept pioneered by Doctor Moe Howard, who discovered that a patient could be made to forget about the pain in his foot if he was poked hard enough in the eyes. Modern practice replaces the physical finger poke with hi-tech equivalents such as voice-mail and referral slips, but the result remains the same.
Q) Do all diagnostic procedures require pre-certification?
A) No. Only those you need.
Q) What are pre-existing conditions?
A) This is a phrase used by the grammatically challenged when they want to talk about existing conditions. Unfortunately we appear to be pre-stuck with it.
Q) Well, can I get coverage for my pre-existing conditions?
A) Certainly, as long as they don't require any treatment.
Q) What happens if I want to try alternative forms of medicine?
A) You'll need to find alternative forms of payment.
Q) My pharmacy plan only covers generic drugs, but I need the name brand. I tried the generic medication, but it gave me a stomach ache. What should I do?
A) Poke yourself in the eye.
Q) What accounts for the largest portion of health care costs?
A) Doctors trying to recoup their investment losses.
Q)Will health care be any different in the next century?
A) No, but if you call right now, you might get an appointment by then.
Funny thing this, I plagiarised this from a medical site, written as a joke by a doctor. It isn't a joke, doc's can laugh at the truth.... But seriously we have been pushed into certain beliefs through repetition, constant denial and having the ability to think as an individual,denied from us. Just question accepted doctrine, be it religion, law, health personal finance, friendships anything ,and if you don't follow the leader "as Simon says" see what happens. Generally it is ostrasation and ridicule, anger directed, as well as insults, at you. How may question why you have these thoughts or even communicate by discourse their own thoughts in an open CONSTRUCTIVE MANNER.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
SOME HMO FAQ'S