Monday, February 11, 2008

The end of the road is in sight

This trip with Hep.C. or rather this regimen of treatment is almost over. Four more weeks of treatment, although another 24 has been discussed, then it's over for me. I haven't got the physical stamina left to carry on any longer. Three years and three tries is enough for now. If svr is not obtainable for me then it is already written in my book and I have done what I can to beat it. Having caught and beaten Hep B. (missed diagnosed at the time) two major operations on my legs and pelvis and the TX's I've endured has left not a lot left in my batteries. Tired in body, mind and spirit I need to spend some recovery time without drugs in my body. I recently had a small tweak of the gonads with some not so good news but have come to terms with it and will have to be more reactive than proactive with my liver. Tough but so the wheel turns and life such as it is goes on.Not the easiest of people to get along with on the best of days my family are still together, it hasn't been easy for them either. My expectations of myself  are sometimes reflected on my expectations of them, not good , as, if I don't measure up  how can I be judgemental on them. I found that recently, or rather on this present treatment ,there have been great changes in my views of others. Having to manage and get through life with all the conflicts that have occurred I have finally learned , patience, tolerance and compassion. Things that were not high in my way of living. Once there was no middle road, there was my way or your way, I tended to walk with a very big limp, favouring the my way side a bit to much. Funny thing is I can walk farther and quicker by stepping on both sides and using the middle, much easier. Well I can see my finish line and if I get a medal for crossing then time will tell.

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